Monthly Archives :

May 2013

Shame has Become Our Default Setting

At the core of our sexual being lies sexual shame instilled through an elaborate structure of cultural mores and religious values. Over millennia, shame has become our default setting. And though I see things changing in the younger generations, the reality is that shame exists deep inside our unconscious sexual identity.

Shame creates strong feelings about sex and sexuality. Feelings that confuse us about our pleasure, needs, wants and desires. Shame can make us feel that what we want to experience is somehow bad, evil or wrong.

And it’s even more subtle than that. The problem for us all is that when we do want to express our deepest desires, we are held back by thoughts of suffering, deprivation, scarcity and fear. read more

Empowering Ourselves to have Better Sex Through Better Communication

I’m just back from teaching in Toronto where my friends and sex educators Reid Mihalko, Monique Darling and me taught a weekend training on Energy Sex. The weekend was incredible, but I personally had a breakthrough that I want to share about the power of sexual communication.

Another friend and fellow sex educator read more

30 Day Sexual Breathing Challenge

This week I want to share a technique that I have been using daily for years: Sexual Breathing. Sexual breathing is a method of moving your sexual energy, building sexual charge and feeling incredible. In fact, doing this for just 30 days in a read more

Is Celibacy Even Possible?

Many people, including the Catholic Church, believe that the highest form of human evolution is the transcendence of sex in the form of celibacy. But as Church sex scandals abound, the question we really need to ask is: is celibacy possible?
I’ll get back to this question in a moment, but first I want to explore what an ideal is. An ideal is a value principle that we pursue as a goal. We humans are interesting animals in the sense that many of us live our lives guided by ideals. read more